ELAINE RICKLES 

When I lay still enough... is an ongoing series of original layered photographic self-portraits addressing the processes of trauma, healing, and acceptance guided by nature, millennia, and reflection.

I suffered a stroke as a young adult due to a rare blood clotting and nervous system syndrome. My arm and hand became paralyzed. I couldn’t recognize my body as my own, it became foreign to me. I’ve had nearly 20 surgeries, enduring severe chronic pain for over a decade. I lost myself trying to survive.
 

When I look at the night sky I feel intense moments of inner peace. I realize the stars are more than ancient, burning for millennia and possibly dead. The same stars of my ancestors. I see the perseverance of ferns that have survived planet wide extinction events. My feelings of disconnection, longing, and loneliness are replaced by a sense of belonging on a particulate level to the living nervous system of the universe. I am part of a continuous cycle of recreation. Reinvented by nature.